New build council homes to be equipped with anti-drone SAM launchers.

Shares in Lockheed Martin spiked today as the announcement of a new range of mini Surface to Air Missile (SAM) launchers were unveiled to wowed investors in Knightsbridge.

SAM

The rapid fire SAM launchers, designed exclusively for gunning down problematic drones come in response to the government “Airspace privacy act” which was coincidentally announced 5 minutes prior to the SAM range unveiling, the deal was tendered later that evening.

All new build council homes will be equipped with the satellite dish sized hardware despite the RSPB raising serious concerns, “the testing whilst impressively gunning down 5 out of 5 test drones also killed 342 pigeons, 24 seagulls, 2 cuckoos and seriously injured a buzzard” commented an RSPB spokesperson.

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